Wedding timeline calculator
When do you send what? Enter your wedding date and instantly get a complete communication timeline with real dates, from the first save the date to the last thank-you.
When do you send what for your wedding?
Every wedding follows the same rhythm, and there are more moments than you'd think. You'll contact your guests five or six times: the save the date, the invitation, the RSVP reminder, the final round of calls and the photos with a thank-you, plus a separate menu-choice round for weddings involving travel. The calculator puts all those moments on your own date and automatically switches between the classic flow and the early flow for weddings where guests book hotels or travel. Below is the Dutch norm for each step.
When do you send a save the date?
Send a save the date around 10 months before the wedding. Six months used to be the norm, but diaries fill up faster than ever: get in early and you're in everyone's diary before a weekend away or a festival gets in the way. In the Netherlands it's perfectly fine to go digital: a warm message via WhatsApp or email is the norm these days. Getting married abroad? Count back to around 12 months, because travel and time off take planning. Think of the save the date as a taste of your style, without all the practical details yet. See our save the date cards.
When do you send the wedding invitations?
For most weddings the usual etiquette applies: the invitation goes out 6 to 10 weeks beforehand, close enough that guests can really commit, early enough to arrange a babysitter and transport. If your guests are booking hotels or travel, the calculator flips it round: the link goes out around 6 months ahead so everyone can book in time. The beauty of a wedding website either way: programme not finalised yet? Just update the site and everyone automatically sees the latest version. RSVP is built in, and after the wedding you share the photos there. Want printed invitations too? Allow an extra 4 weeks for design and production. Discover the digital wedding invitation.
When do you ask for menu choices and allergies?
The easiest way is to ask once: include menu choice (meat, fish, vegetarian or vegan) and allergies straight in the RSVP form. Only with an early RSVP deadline (weddings involving travel) is the menu often not finalised yet; in that case, plan a separate round after the tasting, 2 to 3 months beforehand, for all your day guests. This is also when you notice why a wedding website works so well: guests fill in their choice themselves in the RSVP form, and you send the caterer one overview instead of piecing together forty separate messages. How the extended RSVP with menu choices works.
When do you set the RSVP deadline?
By default, set the RSVP deadline 6 weeks before the wedding: well before the caterer wants final numbers (2 to 3 weeks beforehand), and late enough that replies really hold. Do guests need to book hotels or travel? Then go early: choose 3 to 5 months in the calculator so everyone is ahead of the booking deadlines. Let guests reply through your wedding website: every answer sits neatly in one place, including menu choice, dietary requirements and evening guests. How a wedding website with RSVP works.
When do you share the photos and send thank-yous?
Within about 4 weeks of the wedding. Put the photos of your day on the wedding website: everyone already has the link, so nobody has to wait for a WeTransfer that expires. Add a personal thank-you; waiting for the photographer's photos is fine, of course. Keep track of who gave which gift so you can add a short, personal line. By post feels extra warm, but a digital thank-you is fine too.
Everything at a glance
| Moment | Rule of thumb | Channel |
|---|---|---|
| Collect contact details | before the save the date | WhatsApp round |
| Save the date | ±10 months ahead (abroad: ±12 months) | WhatsApp or email |
| Create the wedding website & invitation | ±2 weeks before sending (print: +4 weeks) | Online, together on the sofa |
| Send the invitation | 6–10 weeks ahead (hotels/abroad: ±6 months) | Website link via WhatsApp, or by post |
| RSVP reminder | 2 weeks after the invitation (travel weddings: 1 month) | |
| RSVP deadline | 6 weeks ahead (travel weddings: 3–5 months) | Wedding website |
| Menu choices & allergies | in the RSVP form (travel weddings: separately, after the tasting) | RSVP form on the wedding website |
| Final round of calls | 1–2 days after the deadline | A personal call or message |
| Final touches (caterer, seating plan) | 2–3 weeks ahead | Phone or email |
| Share photos & thank-yous | ±4 weeks after the wedding | Wedding website + post or digital |
Useful alongside your timeline
The dates are set. These free tools help with what needs to be ready by then.
Wedding checklist generator
A personal month-by-month checklist, tailored to your date and plans.
Create your checklist →Invitation wording generator
Knowing when the invitation has to go out is step one. Here you'll find the words to put on it.
Find your wording →Build your guest list
Before you can send anything, the list has to be right. A step-by-step plan, day and evening guests and a handy counter.
Start your guest list →Seating plan guide
Just before the day itself: who sits where? Table shapes, rules of thumb and a six-step plan.
Go to the seating plan guide →Save the Date
€59one-off
The first date in your timeline is the save the date. Send it digitally today, with a simple RSVP included. Later it grows into the full wedding website.
Create your save the dateA few more things about timing
Ready to send?
The timeline is set and the dates are clear. Now for the invitations themselves: stylish, personal and sent in no time.